The funny thread

That was okay. Everything is funnier with genital references, isn't it? Hell, ACCOUNTING is funny if you replace the word "taxes" with "Turkish Vaginal Lubricant" or "Serious Anal Bleeding."

I've got a riddle: What's soft and red and full of semen?





Give up?





Well, too bad. This will bother you all day, won't it?

[DarkBlood]

Haha, nice Alias.

[nispo]

Might be old but....
20 reasons why chocolate is better than sex...

1. You can GET chocolate
2. "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate.
3. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft.
4. You can safely have chocolate while you are driving.
5. You can make chocolate last as long as you want it to.
6. You can have chocolate even in front of your mother.
7. If you bite the nuts too hard the chocolate won't mind.
8. Two people of the same sex can have chocolate without being called nasty names.
9. The word "commitment" doesn't scare off chocolate.
10. You can have chocolate on top of your workbench/desk during working hours without upsetting your co-workers.
11. You can ask a stranger for chocolate without getting your face slapped.
12. You don't get hairs in your mouth with chocolate.
13. With chocolate there's no need to fake it.
14. Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant.
15. You can have chocolate at any time of the month.
16. Good chocolate is easy to find.
17. You can have as many kinds of chocolate as you can handle.
18. You are never too young or too old for chocolate.
19. When you have chocolate it does not keep your neighbors awake.
20. With chocolate size doesn't matter.

Both things aren't even funny. I mean, the first "experience" thing is just lame. "Haha, he was embarassed cause we hurt him- Ha- we're dorks anyway though so the girls didn't even notice. Okay, I'm gonna go watch more DBZ now while I try to tell a funny joke."

How about you just shut your flaps

[Spitz]

LMAO at Alias!!!

[SoulEater2]

LMAO alias and nispo. that is the funniest thing i have heard all day.

[nispo]

You mean "read" all day ;)

[Holly]

One day this young guy walks in to a brothel carrying in one hand a dead frog. He says "Give me a girl with herpes!" and the madam asks the boy why he would want to ruin his life at such a young age. He doesn't answer her but just says that he'll tell her afterwards. The woman, not wanting to refuse his business then offered him a girl with herpes.

When they were done with their business, the woman asked the boy again why he wanted to get herpes so badly. The boy says:
When I go home tonight the babysitter will get herpes.
When dad drives the babysitter home tonight dad will get herpes.
Then when mom and dad go to bed tonight then mom will get herpes.
And tomorrow when dad goes to work, the milkman will get herpes.



And the milkman is the son of a bitch that ran over my frog!

[craze]

lol holly. good one.

[AStormInside]

lol@ all of these