Welcome to the first ever GG Cribs
Today we'll be looking at my house, me, the toit Mr. B. I'll point out some stuff as we go along. Keep all hands and arms inside the vehicle at all times. Para tu seguridad, por favor, sientate por todo tiempo.
Front of the house
Here's my house. A lot of my friends tell me it's huge and it looks like I'm rich, but it serves it's purpose.
Objects of Interest: The snow melting outside. It's warming up!
Hallway
It has state of the art stairs, which provide movement in both the up and down direction.
Computer Room
Where you wonderful gremlins get to talk to me. I spend too much time here, and it's the coldest room in the house. I'm talking Eskimo cold.
Objects of Interest: The black and white pic in the corner. That's my grandma and grandpa. Grandpa is dead, and that's the only pic we have of him.
Downstairs Bathroom
...I tested out the camera here. Neato...
Objects of Interest: My sexy body.
Dining Room
Here we hold formal dinners for Christmas, Thanksgiving, and the like. Don't let the size fool you, we've fit around 30+ Alvarez's in that room.
Kitchen
Here my mom cooks up a storm. She has never used a cookbook, and does a lot with very little. Easily the best place to be when you want to double your body weight.
Objects of Interest: The dishwasher we have never used. Ever. In the 10 years we have lived in this house, we haven't used it.
Family Room
My friend the TV lives here. This place is also where my parents have parties, and it leads into the backyard patio.
Objects of Interest: My sister's bass and the piano. My dad spent $2,000 on that piano. Who plays it? No one, of course. WAY TO GO DAD.
Backyard
Our lil backyard, which when that tree grows out we can't see anything. In the background is a mini mall, and the smells of Chinese food occasionally wifts our way.
Garage
This pic came out darker than I had hoped. Nothing much to see, your basic garage (car hold for the commoners)
Objects of Interest: My dad's spankin' new Maxmia, which he barely drives. WAY TO GO DAD.
Upstairs Hallway
Awwwwwwwww baby pics. I would be that fat one in blue with rockin glasses. As you can guess, I was born a pimp.
Master Bedroom
This pic really doesn't convey the size of this room. In one corner you can't see the TV, and in the other corner you can't see the exercise bike. Damn my lack of photography skills.
Objects of Interest: The Genesis hidden under the TV that you can't see in this pic. Viva old-skool!
Master Bathroom
Too small to be called master.
Objects of Interest: Is it me, or do I like angry?
My Prison Cell
Ah hah! I bet you all wanted to see my room (bitter silence follows) but you aren't gonna. I hate my room, I hate the size, the smell, the lack of disorder because I'm forced to clean it...we'll just steer clear of it.
Middle Sister's Room
This used to be where my oldest sister slept, but when she got her own apartment my middle sister moved in. I'm refraining from using names, it's an invasion of privacy.
Objects of Interest: The Statue of Liberty pic on her window. Something happened to her and her ex-bf and she smashed her hand through the window. She covered it with that pic.
Youngest Sister's Room
That dumb bitch gets the biggest room in the house. She will perish at my hands.
Objects of Interest: Her recently acquired Spongebob poster. I fear for my life.
Well that's it. Feel free to discuss, bash, post porn, I don't care. Thanks for glancing in at my house. GIVE ME BACK MY HTML.
